One thing that most people learn after attempting nofap is that it is not as easy as it is advertised. Here are some nofap tips and tricks that can be used to avoid relapse when it comes calling.
The list of things that can be done in order to have an advantage over the habit is very long as you would see across different forums. None of them would mean anything if the reasons why they might work are not trusted and internalized.
Some things I discuss here are obvious, but most of them fall under most folks’ blind spots. And when these things do occur, people beat themselves up psychologically and often relapse as a result and keep on relapsing for a very long time.
Tip #1: Don’t do it to get Laid. NoFap’s bigger than that
When I first started nofap, I was doing it because I thought it would help me get laid more. I’ve only had one girlfriend up to that point in my life and the relationship was just shallow and too draining for me but I stuck to the girl because I was so afraid I would be alone. I would get nervous when I talk to girls, I wouldn’t know what to say, and so on.
When I learned about nofap, I was interested in the aspect of it that….Makes you more attractive to the opposite sex.
I knew this was what was missing in my life and that if I was able to do this, I would be getting laid more. But to my surprise, I couldn’t get past the 5-day mark of nofap.
Then I realized that two things are at play here; either getting laid more or attracting the opposite sex doesn’t mean that much to me right now, or I needed to see a therapist.
This was Supposed to be the Perfect Solution To My Girl Problems, But I Just Couldn’t Do it.
But I was getting the small numbers in when I could. 3 days, 4 or 5 days at a stretch of no PMO and my porn and masturbation usage was getting reduced.
I was gradually zoning out of the zombie mode I had been all my life, and it was like in the middle of the streaks, I was getting some much needed fresh air into my lungs and I was beginning to notice the difference between when I’m on my short streaks and when am not.
I wasn’t getting winks from the hot girl down the street and my ED wasn’t cured, but the personal benefits I was experiencing was so right there in front of my face that…I couldn’t ignore them anymore.
I was now like two people. The first person is the zombie I had been all my life. This is who I become when I relapse in between those short streaks.
The second person is that person that starts coming out on the third day of a nofap streak. This person doesn’t react, he is energetic, he talks with people and he is not scared of working on his goals. Though he is moody sometimes, he gets things done once he puts his mind to it.
I started thinking…“I need to find a way to be more of the second guy”
I thought back to my years of fapping every day. I thought back at the patterns I followed when I wanted to achieve any goal. I discovered that I had had numerous goals and dreams which I had failed spectacularly to follow through on.
And the reason for the failure that I discovered after some deep soul searching was that…
I always looked for the shortest path to success.
I was never willing to put in the efforts to create something worthwhile.
I wanted to be a singer; I released a demo and expected to be a star off of that one demo. So, when that didn’t work, I shelved that dream.
I wanted to be a writer; I completed the first draft of a short story only to meet with a strong criticism of the story from friends that I showed the story and I thought I must surely suck as a writer. That dream also went into the bin.
After that I wanted to be a forex day trader; That would surely rake in the big bucks. Or so I thought. I soon found out that it was hard to make money off of experienced traders as a beginner as these people had been trading for more than ten years. That ten years had given them a considerable amount of SCREEN TIME and experience to perfectly execute their strategies. So, I would jump from a shiny program to another, never sticking to one and actually working it for a long duration.
Now, would the second guy mentioned above give up on either of those dreams after one miserable try at success?
The answer is a big fat NO.
This was the first life-changing lesson I learned from Nofapping INCONSISTENTLY.
By then, I knew it wasn’t really about getting more girls. The truths were that if I could internalize this practice and use it to build healthy and goal-getting habits, the benefits of nofapping would spill into every aspect of my life.
I knew I had to work on my life.
Stop trying to take shortcuts and actually work on….Getting back absolute control of my life!
There goes your first tip.
The tip is that if you do nofap for YOU, and make those positive changes, then every other thing will fall into place including the getting laid part. If it is still important to you because you would have become more desirable.
Since the age of 11, I hadn’t gone two weeks without fapping to porn, so I decided I simply wanted to see what that would be like in my life. And friends, with that reason on my mind, I had my first two weeks nofap success.
As regards your willpower to complete your nofap challenge without relapsing again, if you would like to know how it works, and how to boost it specifically for nofap, you can get this manual I’ve written here
When I achieved this first two weeks success…
I wrote this letter to myself;
Nofap is about you. You! You!! You!!! It’s about finding out and being the best version of YOURSELF that there is. You owe it to life and yourself to live to your fullest.
You owe it to life and yourself to express yourself because that’s how and why you are here in the first place. To experience joy, to appreciate the beauty of this crooked life we live in.
To experience the downsides so that you would be grateful for the good times. You only get to live this once. You cannot go through this life numb and not able to feel or experience things. Please, allow life to live through you.
Trick #1: Find a reason that is big enough to keep you on the wagon
In a nutshell, just find a reason that is big enough to keep you on the wagon.
Tip #2: No Progress is Too Small
In my mind, on the pressure scale, there is one end of the spectrum where you aren’t pressurized at all and you are not doing anything as a result.
On the other end, there is surmountable pressure where you know a lot is at stake. So, you are motivated and you take massive action.
Which side is it best to be on? I know this is going to stir up some controversies but I have a lot of evidence supporting my claims.
Knowing is a very powerful thing when it comes to the human’s consciousness.
Truth be told….You can’t go back to ignorance after knowing.
The simple act of knowingness is progress.
If you notice most people that succeed at nofap, they’ve gotten to that level of success with some relapses in their bag. But because of the knowingness they have about the health benefits they stand to gain with completing nofap, they always come back to it after EVERY relapse.
No matter how short your streaks might be, I want you to know that….
You are making progress even if it doesn’t seem like it.
Your brain is gradually catching up on your new patterns and the rewiring process is underway no matter how small it might be.
Since it has been established that you are making progress even if it doesn’t seem like it, it is time to internalize this fact.
Do it your way.
Read the above paragraphs over and over again.
Write it down somewhere until it becomes inextricably attached to every fiber of your being
Trick #2: Nofap Shouldn’t just be a Challenge;
It is meant to be a way of life
I always say this and I know am going to step on some toes as most folks wouldn’t agree with this.
But if fapping has done some real damage to your physiological, mental, spiritual and emotional health, then you would have no problem accepting this.
Think long term.
Aim for the stars, reach the sky.
It is cumulative.
You might be failing because you don’t have a big reason why, but when you are really ready for it, and you say to yourself; “I’m done! That’s it period!”, it would be easier.
The next on my list of tricks and tips is…
Tip #3: The inevitability of a relapse!
Before I start spilling out my guts here, I would like to point out that it is almost inevitable to avoid a NoFap relapse when first attempting to do NoFap.
I am yet to come across anyone that hasn’t fallen into the relapse pit once or twice while trying to do their reboot.
It’s a neurological impossibility not to relapse. It is a normal process in any addiction recovery and something that is bound to happen while starting out abstaining from p**rn.
If you’ve never experienced relapse while doing nofap the first or second time..
I dare you to come forward…
..by sharing your experience in the comments section of this page.
If you did nofap and succeeded in the first or second attempt, then two things are involved.
- You were never really a PMO addict or
- You are an alien.
Since it has now been established that we are all human, it is time to internalize the fact that relapse will and must happen.
Do it how you will.
Read the above paragraphs over and over again.
Write it down somewhere (by hand) until you accept it
You can learn more about willpower, concentration and focus, and the prefrontal cortex in this manual
Trick #3: Use the guilt and shame for motivation, Forgive yourself, and move on
So, the trick is that when the inevitable relapse occurs, just use the guilt and shame that normally follows “after the act” to immediately make…
Next time you are on nofap and you are tempted to relapse, just try to remember…
How you really feel after m**turbating.
Most importantly, don’t forget to forgive yourself because we all have a tendency to beat ourselves up after we fall off any type of wagon.
Tip #4: Boredom is your vicious enemy while on nofap
Whenever I’m on nofap, one of the things that easily leads to my relapse is boredom. Those days when you are just by yourself in your room, and due to past programming…You are really tempted to watch p**rn.
The only solution to boredom is to cut it to the barest minimum.
This brings us to the next trick which is;
Trick #4: Fill your time and instruct your brain to get dopamine hits somewhere else
Get more positive and empowering activities to fill the time you are likely going to be bored. Choose carefully and don’t take on too much.
Closing thoughts on nofap tips and tricks to prevent relapse
Any effort you put into your nofap journey will always be cummulative and even if you can’t stop relapsing, just keep at it.
The more you do it, the easier it becomes and…
The longer your streaks will be.
Wish you all the best on your nofap journey.
If you have any addition that you feel might be helpful to other people on nofap, please feel free to add it in the comment section below.
STAY BLESSED. STAY WEALTHY.